Surviving A Bad Boss

BLOGGER'S NOTE:  After several serendipitous encounters over the passed few months with the quote, "Managers make you feel their importance, leaders make you feel your own." I thought it a great opportunity to write about the number one reason why most employees quit their jobs - the bad boss.  Here's my story...

Many years ago, I worked for a smallish business.  Shortly after starting the owner, who interviewed and hired me directly made a conscious decision, or so it seemed, to make every hour between 8am and 5pm completely unbearable for me.  Perhaps it was my optimistic smile, positive and productive client relationships or better yet how much others in the office liked me that fueled his blatant distain. Whatever it was, nothing I did professionally or personally (he even despised the car I drove) was to his liking, and he took every opportunity to make sure I knew it.

Though I didn't rock in a fetal position under my desk like my prior peer, I cried most nights and dreaded Sundays, as I knew the next morning my own personal hell for the next five days would begin again.  I was in a constant state of unshakeable panic and had terrible anxiety-drive insomnia for which I temporarily was on medication (as I eventually would find out, so were most of my coworkers).  Feeling as if I couldn't take another minutes of my boss' incessant criticism, I called my mom seeking the temporary comfort only she could provide.  In the most understanding and I-wish-I-could-make-it-better tone she said something I've never forgotten, "Awwww honey...  Welcome to the work world."

BAD BEHAVIOR
Was my bad boss experience merely an over reaction based on a self-professed sensitive nature? With absolute certainty I say no and here's why - bad bosses, like germs, are everywhere. They exist in all work environments regardless of industry or company size.  In fact, an employment study conducted by Delta Road found that 80 percent of participants "identified their boss as a lousy manager"and almost 70 percent said that their immediate supervisor had "no clue what to do to become a good manager."

Not only are bad bosses everywhere, studies also have shown the adverse mental and physical health effects of their negative behaviors.  Specifically, bad bosses are increasing the rate of chronic stress that often results in high blood pressure, loss of sleep and in extreme cases, heart attacks.  Other bad boss side effects include excessive smoking, drinking and overeating.

Through my own experiences as well as those of countless colleagues, friends, family members and candidates, I've learned of the many behavioral commonalities among bad bosses. From these commonalities, I share the bad boss archetypes below.  I'm sure they will resonate.

BAD BOSS ARCHETYPE	BAD BEHAVIOR
Uncommunicative Commander	Fails to convey necessary expectations for employees to do their jobs
Workplace Warrior (Workaholic)	Expects employees to live to work not work to live; believes vacation is for wimps and lunch optional; openly admits employees only are as good as their last paychecks
Malingering Micromanager	Desires (often unconsciously) control over employees’ work; hovers to ensure work gets completed a specific way – generally their own
Methodic Manipulator	Plays employees against one another for personal benefit; confides in employees then uses information gathered against them; provides positive feedback only when it's convenient
The Bully	Uses fear and coercion (consciously) to direct employees activities and drive results
The Creeper	Sub-class of the Bully, uses position of power to justify inappropriate interactions (often of a sexual nature) with employees

BAD FOR BUSINESS
Not only are Work Warriors, Malingering Micromanagers and Methodic Manipulators the bane of most employees' professional existences, they're bad for business.  Bad bosses create disengaged work environments that ultimately cost companies not only top producers but according to a recent employment report, $360 billion every year in lost productivity. In her visually powerful Inc. "The Real Cost of Bad Bosses" infographic, http://bit.ly/1lgH8K, Meghan Quimet further demonstrates just how many employees are affected by bad bosses.  Here are a few highlights:

• Three out of every four employees report that their boss is the worst and most stressful part of their jobs
• 65 percent of employees say that they'd take a new boss over a pay increase
• 50 percent of employees that don't feel valued plan to look for another job this year

SURVIVING A BAD BOSS

Since we take less vacation, work longer days and retire later than our global peers, finding satisfaction in work relationships, especially with our bosses, is imperative not only to our productivity but mental and physical health.  So how is such job satisfaction found when statistically most employees report to and take direction from uninspiring and undervaluing bad bosses?

In work as in life, I believe it's essential to actively participate.  When suffering a bad boss, a professional must participate by first identifying the reason for their work-day discontent.  In other words, why do they consider their bad boss so bad?  Is it his lack of communications and direction? The way she expects the team to work unreasonable hours?  How he tells inappropriate and uncomfortable jokes?  Figuring this out will allow a frustrated professional to determine the best course of action and develop a proactive plan.

When determining this plan, however, it is important to keep in mind that attitude is everything.  If an employee truly is looking to make their relationship with their boss more bearable, they must subjectively evaluate their own behavior and assess what they're doing or not doing to contribute to their situation.  They must want to make their situation better and ask themselves how to do so. Though every situation is unique, there are many proactive ways a professional can survive their bad boss.  Below are a few helpful suggestions:

• Manage up - Take control of a professional situation by doing work that makes a bad boss look better to their supervisors and peers
• Initiate a conversation - Tell (never blaming) a bad boss about work struggles and provide proactive solutions
• Avoid gossiping or complaining to coworkers - Tempting as it may be, commiserating with team members about a bad boss is never a good idea
• Seek out a professional mentor - Find a well-respected coworker within the company or externally who is capable of advising on career growth and development, as well as provide constructive feedback on how to deal with a bad boss
• Find a positive outlet for stress - Do something productive everyday to take focus off of bad boss struggles - exercise, find a hobby, volunteer, spending time with positive people
• Wait it out - Stay put, at least for now.  Others in a company already may know of a bad boss' bad behavior and not allow it for long

A MORE FINAL OPTION

Though quitting is an option and in some cases the only, I recommended it if a relationship with a bad boss is beyond repair.  No business environment is immune to bad bosses and the probability of leaving a toxic situation only to land in another is realistic.  It's also important to hold off on an exit strategy before weighing overall pros and cons (engaging work, great coworkers, short commute, epic grill cheese in the cafeteria vs. bad boss). Believe me fulfilling work isn't easy to find, so don't make any rash or regrettable decisions based on a bad boss' abominable behavior.

BACK TO MY STORY...

After a few years of proactive self-assessment and good old-fashion trying to turn lemons into lemonade, I moved on to another professional opportunity.  In this new role my boss, not without her flaws or me mine, treated me well while developing my career.  Though I learned a great deal from her, I gained even more knowledge from my former bad boss. Of course it was years later that I came to this realization but when I did, I was thankful.  Thankful that my bad boss had taught me how to handle and ultimately survive difficult people, as well as better appreciate those in the workplace who treat others with kindness and respect.  Something we all could use a little more of.